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The flier read "Want to be a movie star but don't look like one?" I readfurther and it said, "Phase 3 Clinical Drug Trial, now acceptingsubjects. Afraid that you are undocumented? Don't worry! Allparticipants who complete the trial and undergo a physical change willreceive new documentation. Subjects will receive room and board at afive star hotel fully paid by Genesis Pharmaceuticals. Upon completionof the trial subjects will receive $25,000, a fully furnished apartmentwith a lease fully paid for 1 year, and assistance with job placement inshow business. For more information or to sign up for the trial pleasecall (888) 682-2112."It felt like God had put that flier there just for me to find! I pulledout my phone and dialed the number. I friendly voice answered saying"Thank you for calling Genesis Pharmaceuticals, this is Amber, how may Iassist you today?" I tried to suck up and in my most friendliest voicereplied, "Good morning Amber, my name is Henry Duvall and I just read aflier on. "Laughing Kate said, "And I thought I was so careful." Yes you were, more careful than Ellie. You know how untidy she can be,I find her vibrators in odd places around the house, you never didthat." I never had the courage to go and buy one at that age, I used thehandle of my hairbrush." I worry about Ellie," their mum said, "I know she has a string ofboyfriends, I just hope she's taking precautions." Don't worry mum, she says she is on the pill and as far as I know noboy has yet popped her cherry. To use her words 'they can finger notfuck' and 'I'll suck not fuck.'" Well I'm glad she's taking precautions while still having funexperimenting. You kids seem to think you invented sex. We wouldn'tall be here if our forebears hadn't enjoyed a bit of sex."She was right of course, why did we never think of our parents assexual beings with their own needs and desires? Whatever we thoughtabout them, there was no such thing as immaculate conception."Don't think your father and I are innocent.
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